Mary's; he had requested to be removed from the general gaze of the crew, and have a place assigned him where he might collect his mind and endeavor to prepare to meet the sudden summons to appear before his Maker. I had already been interested in the man, having heard a description of his proper demeanor before the Court — his being far superior to the general character of seamen, and his personal appearance at once pleaded much in his favor. His defense was brief, and it is said to have drawn tears to the eyes of several of the Court. He expressed to me much fear that God would not forgive his sins, therefore had but little hope.
He continued, "it is a hard thing to die, but to die a violent death is harder still, and so short a time to prepare for it! I fear that my present desires and purposes of repentance and prayer to God, are but the result of the fear of meeting the judgment day; but a life of virtue and of piety looks to me far the most inviting, and had I to relieve my time, I trust I should pursue a different course and lead a religious life. But I fear again that even these feelings and impressions are but the result of my fearful apprehension as I cast my view into the other world. I have not got the brokenness of heart I wish to feel, and the peace of mind of which I have read that a sincere penitent experiences.
I wish it — I have prayed for it — but do not feel it." Such was the drift of this man's own voluntary confession, made with great modesty and humility of demeanor. I spent considerable time with him — prayed with him — gave him marked passages in the different parts of the prayer book to be read, and left him; while he earnestly entreated that I would be with him as often as I could. I shall see him again to-morrow, early in the morning. Agreeably to my purpose, I went on board the St. Mary's this morning, 15th, to visit the prisoner, whose term of life seems in the opinion of most of the officers of the fleet, to be drawing to a clo3 '.
I found Lieutenant P. with him, (the offic •;■ h ■ had knocked down,)a young uvntleman much to be commended for the course he had pursued towards this man. Lieutenant P. was now irivino- ]mn christian counsel and endeavoring to further him to his preparation to leave the world. He too had already been to the command' 'r-in-chief, to express his hope, if compatible with his view of sustaining the influence of the discipline in the navy, that this man might be pardoned. And the prisoner seemed not insensible to such kindness; and no one can behold it without approbation and commendation towards Lieutenant P., and feel that it was an unkind blow indeed that should have been directed to such an officer.
The young man continued to weep, hopeless of having the time of his mortal life extended beyond " to-morrow," as he said, at this hour at which we were then conversing, " and might it be that he himself could see the commodore, and plead himself before him, in his own language, for his life — but it seemed it could not be, and I will think no more about it! " The hour, and more was passed! and the principle part of the interview was spent in conversation on the topics that make up the plan of salvation, through Jesus Christ, who came to save sinners. A boat having come for me, from the St. Mary's, in answer to a signal, made by the Cumberland, 1 went on board the St.
Mary's, this morning, Thursday, 17, a little after 9 o'clock, as no indications were discoverable from any quarter, that the wretched man condemned to death would be pardoned or reprieved. There had been many conjectures made as to the ulterior design of the commander-in-chief, and various sentiments advanced as to the probability that the execution would take place. I believe it was quite a prevalent impression throughout the squadron, though that sentiment seemed to change at different hours, that this unfortunate man at the last moment would be pardoned. I had myself felt the influence of this impression, and I had delayed until this morning, to make known to the captain a wish which the prisoner had expressed to me yesterday, that I would be with him on the day of execution.